Everything’s Just Ducky

The weather’s just dandy, ducks!

I still can’t believe that this duck pattern is so simple, but I’m looking at the instructions, and I’ve got the googly eyes, so I guess I’m going to give it a go.

Happy Pesach, Good Friday, Spring & Weekend to Everybody. Now that I am actively trying to…reduce (grump, grump, GRUMP!), I have to be a bit less… er, social, which means no more swanning around from house to house chatting up friends and relatives and indulging in whatever little Cadbury bits people bestow upon me (around this time of year, it’s just as well — I mean, marshmallow PEEPS! UGH! Not that it stopped me from eating them, sadly.). However, I shall still come bearing gifts when I do pop by — and what better time of year than to bring macaroons?

Macaroons are a traditional cookie during Passover for Jewish families because they follow kosher laws – they contain no wheat, rye, barley, oats and spelt that take more than 18 minutes to cook completely (after coming in contact with water), and no leavening. The recipe I found is for almond macaroons, which is traditional, or you can use Mac’s ultra-healthy, chewy coconut/okara macaroons. (Even if you don’t have okara, those are quite tasty!)

ALMOND MACAROONS

2 cups almonds (1 1/2 cups ground)

1 cup xylitol (or sucanat or white sugar)

Zest of 1 large lemon

3 egg whites

Canola oil cooking spray

A blender

A mixer

FIRST, Preheat oven to 275.

NEXT, Line a cookie sheet with heavy duty foil and spray with canola oil.

* In a covered blender, chop up the almonds half at a time until finely ground.

* In a bowl, beat the egg whites with a mixer until they form soft peaks.

* Add the lemon zest.

* Gradually add the Sucanat and beat until the whites are very stiff and shiny but not dry.

* Fold in the ground almonds.

* Take spoonfuls and drop onto the cookie sheet about 1 – 1 1/2 inches apart.

* Bake for 20 – 30 minutes, or until edges are hard, but the middle is still soft and golden.

* After 5 minutes, carefully place the foil with the baked macaroons on a cookie sheet to cool.

These are a bit like sugar cookies – the almonds, when finely ground, look a little like raw, browned sugar. A dip in chocolate, and they’re even better! And speaking of a chocolaty – and still healthyish – macaroon alternative, try:

Chocolate-Coconut Macaroons

* 3 cups unsweetened coconut, lightly packed

* 1/4 cup cocoa

* 1 cup sugar

* 2 tbsp. matzah cake meal or potato starch

* 4 egg whites, room temperature

* 1 teaspoon vanilla extract or orange (or lemon or pineapple) juice

* 1/4 cup honey

FIRST, preheat the oven to 325 F. Place parchment or nonstick baking sheets.

Place coconut, cocoa, sugar, and matzah meal in food processor bowl. Pulse until coconut is finely ground, about 10 seconds. Add egg whites, vanilla and honey. Process until everything is well mixed, about 10 seconds.

Spoon well-rounded teaspoonful of mixture onto baking sheets, leaving 1 inch between cookies. Bake for 12 to 14 minutes, until dull and no beads of moisture show. Using a metal spatula, carefully remove from parchment onto racks to cool. Makes about 32 cookies.

Be sure and have some handy storage for these – they’ll last a couple of weeks in an airtight tin. Cheers!

Opinionated Foodie

Periodically, I find something so truly cringe-worthy that it’s funny. Here is a screed from one of my favorite Sarcastic Chefs, Anthony Bourdain. I used to really dislike Anthony Bourdain. I thought, How can that guy even taste anything as much as he smokes? Who is he to set himself up as a foodie?!

Well, the trick is, he’s not a foodie, he’s a guy that … eats. And reads. And speaks. And thus, has every right to his opinionated, wide-mouthed, long-legged, slouching toward sarcastic-land self. Yes, okay! He kind of grows on you. Like moss. Or mold. Anyway, he guest-blogged awhile back at the site of food writer Michael Ruhlman, and went OFF on the Food Network. Hilarious results, one of which was:

Her ear-shattering tones louder and louder. We KNOW she can’t cook. She shrewdly tells us so. So…what is she selling us? Really? She’s selling us satisfaction, the smug reassurance that mediocrity is quite enough. She’s a friendly, familiar face who appears regularly on our screens to tell us that “Even your dumb, lazy ass can cook this!” Wallowing in your own crapulence on your Cheeto-littered couch you watch her and think, “Hell…I could do that. I ain’t gonna…but I could–if I wanted! Now where’s my damn jug a Diet Pepsi?” Where the saintly Julia Child sought to raise expectations, to enlighten us, make us better–teach us–and in fact, did, Rachael uses her strange and terrible powers to narcotize her public with her hypnotic mantra of Yummo and Evoo and Sammys. “You’re doing just fine. You don’t even have to chop an onion–you can buy it already chopped. Aspire to nothing…Just sit there. Have another Triscuit…Sleep….sleep….”

Another person who believes in St. Julia!!! Bourdain’s blogging garnered almost 600 comments, one of which was a snarky reply from the Food Network itself. Read at your own risk!!!

Actually, I was just thinking about that… do other nations have FoodTV? Okay, I’ve heard there’s one with the BBC, and surely the French or Italians have some shrine to all that is organ meats and unpronounceable. But are ANY of those channels round-the-clock? Surely someone else has a channel dedicated to 24-hour food programming? No? Just the country with the heaviest people…? The points made about mediocrity and trying for the lowest common denominator really resonate with me – why go to Farmer’s Market when you can buy something in a can? Why shop for fresh veg in the market, even, when you can buy it prefab? This, dear ones, is from whence the whole spinach-equals-salmonella thing comes… when we find ourselves too busy to even wash and cut our own vegetables.

When your CSA gives you carrots… and carrots… and carrots… You become creative really fast. Having less than half a kitchen has meant that we’ve needed to rely on our crock pot and single electric burner on the really bad days when the stove was unplugged in the middle of the floor. In trying desperately to keep up with the flood of cold weather foods, we’ve started just cooking the carrots, pureéing them, and using them as soup base. This is a fabulous example of one of our favorite soups:

Carrot Ginger Soup with Coconut Milk
i n g r e d i e n t s

  • 3/4 cup scallion (green onion) chopped fine
  • 1 small onion, cut in 4 pieces
  • 1 1/2 pounds carrots cut in 1″ pieces
  • 1 tablespoon fresh ginger root, peeled, grated (or used dried, if you have it)
  • 2 teaspoon curry powder (or to taste)
  • 1 14-ounce can lower salt/fat vegetable broth
  • 1 13.5-ounce can unsweetened coconut milk + extra for garnish
  • 1 tablespoon fresh lime juice (approximate 1/2 small lime – lemon works too)
  • fresh chives for garnish (or use French’s dehydrated onions, or fried scallions)

d i r e c t i o n s
Place scallions, onion pieces and carrots in a food processor. Process turning on and off rapidly until the vegetables are coarse chopped. If you’re starting this in the morning, this step can be simplified by doing a rough chop of the veg and shoving them in the crock pot for about two hours.)

Combine chopped vegetables, grated ginger root, curry powder and chicken broth in a large saucepan. Bring to a boil and simmer for about 20 minutues until the vegetables are very soft.

Strain vegetables and reserve the liquid. Add vegetables to food processor in two batches and process until smooth. (If you trust the seal on your food processor, you can do this with the liquid still warm – for the rest of us, wait until things cool a bit, or use a stick blender in the pot as the safest method for not splattering yourself with hot carrot mush.)

This is basically the base of your soup… from the carrot base, you can go a variety of directions. We add a half can of coconut milk and about a package (14 oz.) medium firm tofu in chunks and simmer it. I also take about a quarter tsp. of coriander pods, heat them in a dry saucepan to revive their oils, and then mortar and pestle grind them and add them while the soup simmers. Tropical soups tend to be both sweet, sour and creamy, so I also add about four tablespoons of mae ploy sauce, to give it both heat and sweet, and I have been known to add Thai lime leaves, mushrooms, and more. My friend Rachel adds chickpeas.

Everyday Brown Bread

For those who’ve heard me talk about baking bread and don’t really want to “wing it,” here’s what I basically end up doing when I bake “sandwich” bread, or non-savory bread. If you want a savory bread, you’re looking for the recipe at Barley Boules, which can also have olives added to it & give you olive bread. The recipe below is for people who shy away from true Whole Wheat bread; if you want (and I do), you can simply swap Whole Wheat for the White flour & you’ll be OK.

Basic Everyday Bread:

  • 4C water
  • 2C whole wheat flour
  • 2C white flour
  • 1C Quinoa flour (optional, but recommended)
  • 2C Flax Seeds (I use golden, but it doesn’t matter except in appearance: dark seeds make mottled looking bread)
  • 1/2C Oat Bran
  • 1/4C Wheat Germ
  • 1C Molasses
  • 1/2C Honey
  • 1 Tbsp sugar
  • 2 Tbsp Yeast (not the rapid-rise junk!)
  • 1 Tbsp salt
  1. Proof yeast in bottled / filtered water (bring water to 105-110 deg. F, add sugar, add yeast, wait 10 min’s for it to “bloom”).
  2. Add whole wheat flour (and Quinoa flour, if you’ve got it) to water & cover with plastic wrap (I put a heating pad on low underneath the bowl if the house is cool). Let this rise until tripled in size.
  3. Add honey and molasses and mix in white flour until you have a very moist dough-ball (don’t add too much!). Let this rise until doubled in size.
  4. Add the dough ball & then set the mixer to knead the dough. Let it knead until you’ve got the consitency of chewing gum – don’t worry, you could go for about 15 minutes and not overknead. I’ve had the Kitchenaid overheat ’cause I let it go so long, and it was just fine.
  5. Add all the seeds, bran, wheat germ, and the salt (don’t forget that, whatever you do, ’cause it controls the yeast growth) to your Kitchenaid’s mixing bowl along with a little bit of white flour, and let it knead at least until all of the seeds have been incorporated. Keep adding little bits of white flour to keep the dough from sticking to the sides, as needed.
  6. Dump out onto a floured surface and let rest for a bit; divide into 4 loaves; shape and place into oiled loaf pans; spray tops with olive oil; cover with plastic and let them rise until they’ve almost doubled in size. (You can tell that they’ve risen enough if, when you poke them gently, the dimple doesn’t really want to spring back)
  7. Place into a 350 deg. F oven & bake until interior temperature (probe thermometer, here) is 190 deg. F. You can go a bit darker or a bit lighter than 190, but not more than 5 degrees lighter or you’ll have raw dough.
  8. Let cool in their pans for about 10 minutes, so they “sweat” and release from the pans.
  9. Cool on racks, covered with a tea-towel, overnight & they’ll be easier to slice.

Spiced Chocolates

More for today’s avoidance of work (by posting recipes), here’s one which everyone should try, because it’s so easy and so good. The exotic ingredient in this recipe is “coconut cream” or “coconut powder” which can be obtained at your local Asian market. If you can’t find it, you can simply go with powdered sugar, but … well, coconut cream doesn’t add any sweetness to the mix, so I think it’s better:

Fudge Truffle Centers (if you can wait that long):

  • 4 oz unsweetened chocolate
  • 1 can sweetened condensed milk
  • 1 cup sugar
  • 1 Tbsp vanilla
  • 1/8 tsp freshly cracked black pepper (fine)
  • 1/8 tsp freshly grated nutmeg
  • 1/8 tsp chipotle or cayenne powder
  • 1 teensy pinch of ground cloves
  • powdered coconut cream
  • powdered ginger

Boil chocolate, sweetened condensed milk, sugar, & spices until you feel as if it’s about to burn (about 3 minutes), stirring constantly. Remove from heat, add vanilla & stir until incorporated. Pour immediately into a pan & let cool. Cut into equal portions & roll into balls & then roll in coconut cream / ginger mixture. Let sit at least 12 hours before serving, as the coconut cream will draw moisture & form a shell. The longer you wait to eat them, the better they end up tasting! If you’re going to incorporate them as centers to truffles, you’ll want to dip them first, so that they don’t make your finishing coat all dusty with the coconut cream powder.

Lemon Death

This one’s something to make about once a year, and to have lots of friends around to help you eat, because it’s all about being special. I picked this one up from a coffee shop I worked for when I was in college. They’ve since gone out of business – probably due to killing their customers off with such rich food as this:

Artery-Coating Lemon Cake:

  • 5 Lemons
  • 2 Cups Granulated Sugar
  • 1¼ Cups Buttermilk
  • 4 Eggs
  • 3 Cups White Flour
  • 1¾ tsp Baking Powder
  • 1 tsp Baking Soda
  • ¼ tsp Salt
  • ¾ Cup Unsalted Butter, melted
  1. Mix Butter and Sugar until smooth. Add eggs one at a time, while mixing with a hand mixer. Set mixture aside
  2. Process Lemon Peels in food processor until the pieces are smaller than grains of rice – they should almost seem like a coarse flour.
  3. Mix Lemon Peels with remaining dry ingredients.
  4. Mix one third of the dry mixture into the creamed, then mix in one half of the buttermilk, then one third or the dry mixture again, then the remaining buttermilk followed by the remaining dry mixture.
  5. Pour into 2 greased 9″x5″ pyrex loaf pans. Bake at 325°F for 50 to 55 minutes. Allow to cool in the pans before removing to a platter, not to a cooling rack.
  6. Juice some of the lemons and mix juice with some sugar. Glaze cooled, sliced cakes with this mixture to taste.

Warning: Failure to follow the steps will result in utter failure! This is a suspension cake – which means that it won’t ordinarily come together to make a cake, but will result in something far from anything edible! It is important that each grain of sugar be coated in butter and then egg, and that each granule of lemon is coated with flour. In this manner, the particles are suspended. Over-mixing will destroy this suspension, as will trying to rush the thing together. Just follow the directions!

Fiber Bombs

We started these off with a basic carrot cake recipe, and it’s morphed to the point where we don’t believe they’re the same thing whatsoever. We call them Fiber Bombs because there’s so much danged fiber in them, and because they really have an effect upon your system, especially if you’re one who’s a stranger to fiber. To us, they’re just snacks, but to my coworkers? Well, let’s just say “colon health,” shall we?

Fiber Bombs:

  • 1/2 cup pecans or walnuts, toasted and coarsely chopped
  • 2 cups grated raw carrot (about 2-3 carrots)
  • 1 large apple, grated
  • Some Raisins (to preference – maybe a cup or two)
  • 2 cups (280 grams) all-purpose flour (or White Whole Wheat)
  • 3/4 cup golden flax seeds
  • 1/4 cup wheat germ
  • 1/4 cup oat bran
  • 1/4 cup sugar
  • 1/2 cup honey
  • 1/2 cup molasses
  • 3/4 teaspoon baking soda
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
  • 1 cup coconut (unsweetened. if using sweetened, omit the sugar)
  • 1 cup water
  • 1/2 cup flax seeds, ground
  • 3 tbsp olive oil
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract
  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (180 degrees C) and place rack in center of oven. Place paper liners in 18 muffin cups.
  2. Toast the pecans or walnuts for about 8 minutes or until lightly browned and fragrant. Let cool and then chop coarsely.
  3. Finely grate the carrots and apple (an Asian Mandoline works fabulously for this). Set aside.
  4. In a large bowl whisk together the flour, sugar, baking soda, baking powder, salt, and ground cinnamon. Stir in the nuts and coconut. Set aside.
  5. In a separate bowl whisk together the ground flax seed, water, oil, and vanilla extract. Fold the wet ingredients, along with the grated carrot and apple, into the flour mixture, stirring just until moistened. Evenly divide the batter between the prepared muffin cups and bake for 20 – 25 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean.
  6. Remove from oven and let cool on a wire rack. After about 10 minutes remove the muffins from the pans and cool completely on a wire rack.

Cranberry Muffins

I thought it appropriate that, for post number 99, I should throw a recipe out there. After all, this site’s about not being able to bake things as often as we’d like, at least in part. So, without further ado, and for Writegrrrl because of the loss of her email:

Cranberry Muffins:

  • 1C Xylitol
  • 2C Sugar
  • 6C White Whole Wheat Flour (King Arthur), Sifted
  • 2/3C Flaxseed, Ground
  • 3C Water
  • 1 Orange’s Zest, finely chopped
  • 1 Orange’s Juice
  • 1 Tbsp Vanilla
  • 2 Packages Cranberries
  • 1C Candied Ginger, Chopped
  • 5 Cloves
  • 1 Inch Cinnamon Stick
  • 1 “Arm” of Star Anise
  • 8 Allspice Berries
  • 2 Tbsp Baking Powder
  • 1/2 Tbsp Salt

Grind spices along with Flaxseed and add to the water, orange, vanilla, sugars. Mix in everything else until you have a smooth batter – you could go “muffin method” here, or could mix until it’s as smooth as cake batter. Either way, it works. After all that, add in the cranberries, drop into muffin tins and/or cake pans, and bake at 350 until a toothpick comes out cleanly.

Kitchens and Foodies and Thoughts, Oh My…

It’s been awhile since I’ve been here, and I can’t honestly say it’s for any reason other than the fact that lately I have been having Huge Food Issues, and I got that post-holiday guilt-thing kicking in, which made me avoid mirrors, closets and scales for a bit. (What I should have been avoiding was the bloody TV. Could we STOP with the Slimfast ads, for just a week or two? Sheesh.) Now that my brain is safely back inside my body (or hovering nearby), we rejoin my daily obsession already in progress…

My buddy Jackie got the new Joy of Cooking, and man, am I jealous. (Yes, I am a cookbook whore.) She shifts the recipes just a titch to make them workable for a vegan-veggie type, and has reminded me of something I adore: roasted chickpeas. I first had them in a Peruvian restaurant, mixed with roasted and salted hominy, and I’ve been striving to recapture that nutty, addictive tastiness ever since. The Peruvian folks probably fried their bar snacks instead of baking them, but I’m going to simply:

1.) Open and rinse a can of garbanzo beans,

2.) Turn them out onto a pan, and pat them a bit dry;

3.) Spritz them with a bit of olive oil, and sprinkle them with a tiny bit of salt, onion powder, curry powder, and turmeric,

4.) Oven roast them in a preheated, 400 degree oven for approximately (depending on your oven) thirty minutes, opening the oven to shake it about every ten minutes,

5.) Serve with chopped cilantro and lemon juice spritzed onto their crackly outsides, and inhale. Yum.

These chickpeas are tasty with the hominy (treated in the selfsame way) or mixed with raisins and dark chocolate chips as movie munchies. (Okay – if you like salt and sweet tastes together, this works. Otherwise, just ignore me.)

Been checking out some interesting blogs lately. Mac’s already remarked on the Post Punk People, and my find is Yeah, That Vegan Sh*t, a site about all things vegan, and Vegan Core, way fun because it has pretty pictures and plenty of recipes. I expect I’ll visit that one repeatedly; I’m always intrigued by people who test recipes and change them to suit. So much less work for me!

And speaking of less work – in my continuing quest to figure out what to do with that Vegemite, I’ve actually stuck my finger in it, and given it a taste. It’s really … not half bad. I’m still not up to it on toast (sorry, T&C), but it may have a future as more than just a soup base. My favorite use for it thus far? As a non powder form yeast in scrambled tofu. Here’s my updated take on it:

SCRAMBLED TOFU

1 lb. medium tofu (medium is better, for me – some prefer firm)

1 tbsp. oil, or use your sprayer as needed.

2 tbsp. snipped chives

1 tsp. onion powder, turmeric and curry powder

one crumbled sage leaf

1 tsp. Vegemite

After rinsing the tofu, I grab it in my fist and basically crumple it up. I toss the chunky bits into my lightly oiled pan and sprinkle heavily with onion powder and more lightly with turmeric and curry. The turmeric will give it a yellowy color that makes some people feel better about eating non-eggs. I then add the Vegemite, and let it soften in the heat before stirring it in. It adds both saltiness and a nice depth of flavor. Finish with the snipped chives and voilá!

Some people enjoy finely diced mushrooms in their scrambled tofu, grated carrots and other items. Imagine it as a chicken-egg omelet, and let your tastes be your guide. I prefer to keep it simple, unless I make this as a brunch item, then I really jazz it up, adding herbs and cheeses and Tofurky Italian sausages. I’ve heard chopped spinach and roasted sweet potato added to it is tasty… ah, to each their very own.

The remodel galumphs on… It’s definitely not galloping in any way, shape, or form. Still, it’s had its high points. We had a great little visit to KWW Kitchens & Baths in San Leandro, where we walked through Kitchen/Bath heaven, at least from the point of view of myriad cabinets, huge slabs of fabricated stone counter tops, slick modern fixtures, and more. It was well worth the trip down I-880, because it was really quite inexpensive. Most of the goods are likely from China, and we opted to go with real granite tiles on the counter instead of a fabricated slab, but it’s a definite check-it-out for Bay Area folks. (If you look at our remodel pics, you’ll see how it looks.) Of course, I feel quite scarred that we will not able to put an Aga range in our new kitchen, as Minty and Simon from Posh Nosh urged us to do. Alas, we ordinary mortals must make do without the hundred year old range that the fabulous Marchmont’s have at Crowe Hall, their house in Upper Berkshire which was built in 1685… sigh.

I think our builders over-estimated how easy this was going to be… now with tightly fitting cabinets (Mac is an EXACT mathematician; I think he has quite terrified the builders), ancient plumbing and cracked copper pipes, and the odd drooping ceiling, I believe they’re getting a little worried about the timetable. They thought they could fully gut and rebuild a tiny kitchen in just a week. Now we’re on to day five… two to go. They swear it’ll all be functioning on Monday. We’ll see. Meanwhile, the bamboo flooring is on order, and we expect it to be ready to go down on the floor by March. Hope springs eternal…

Kabocha Pasta

kabocha_pasta1
kabocha_pasta1
More in the series: wishiwerebaking.

Our lovely CSA (Riverdog Farm) had given us Kabocha squash several weeks in a row, so we had to do something with it. This is one of the reasons why we belong to a CSA, and one of the recurring challenges with our weekly produce box. Every Wednesday we pick up the box of produce, not knowing what’s in it, and every week we try to use it all up. Or, well, give it away, if it’s something particularly wrong, like that absolutely disgusting Romanesque Broccoli.

In any event, we’ve got all of this squash. So, we baked it, pureed it, and turned it into noodles. Basically, take semolina flour, give it a spin in the food processor with the cutting blade and your herbs (fresh rosemary, onion maybe), and then add your squash. When things have come together into a somewhat moist ball, pull it out and refrigerate overnight. (The resting step doesn’t have to go overnight, but it hydrates the flour quite well, and will make the noodling process easier.) Divide the dough into manageable bits, roll out, run through your pasta roller if you’ve got one, or simply roll as thinly as you can, and cut with a pizza cutter. You’re done, there, but we went the extra step of laying them out for our food dehydrator & running them overnight, so that they’d store well.

Nice, toothsome, thick noodles. Relatives took them all.

To find more about CSA’s, check out KQED’s Blog Entry about them.

Candied Walnuts

walnut7
walnut7
More in the series: wishiwerebaking.

Nuts are supposed to be good for you and all … and I suppose they don’t lose any of their virtue if they’re candied, right?

A friend gave us a large bag of walnuts, saying that they didn’t know what to do with them. So, we took them home and did some thinking. We thought that if we were to candy them then we’d be able to share. Yes. That’s what we thought. They never made it out of the house.

The “recipe” for candied walnuts isn’t really all that deep. The one thing which made the real difference in flavor? That’d be having blanched the walnuts in boiling water first, to remove the tannins from the skin of the meat. It turned the water a nasty brownish color, and the walnuts ended up quite pale in color. From there, it was a matter of letting them dry & mixing up some caramel.

For the caramel, we added some molasses (1/4 cup), sugar (2 cups), water (1/8 cup), and spices (cayenne pepper, cinnamon, nutmeg, allspice, cloves, salt) to a pot and let it go until it was well above the Hard Ball stage, to 265 degrees Fahrenheit. Take it off the heat at this point and carefully add in about 1 tsp vanilla extract. Then just dump the sugar over the nuts in a large bowl, mix until coated, dump out on parchment, and wait. After a couple of hours the caramel will have sugared out a bit, leaving you with something almost the consistency of maple sugar coating the nuts.

Cayenne pepper makes them quite addictive. Don’t leave it out, and don’t be chicken about it, either. We think that it’s what kept these from being gifts … and we’re glad that we don’t get walnuts all that often!