This Land is Your Land, Oh, Wait. Not Really.

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Ah, August. Time of flooded festivals and The Fringe and in George Square it’s the time of movie-making frenzy. Our usually placid square has been carved up, fenced off, and is a major traffic causer. Why? Two words. Brad. Pitt.

He’s makin’ a zombie movie.

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This gets a BIG eye roll around these parts. Last year, in the service of being a judge for a book award, T. had to read one and later complained, “The whole zombie thing has never to me made sense. How come the zombies never eat each other? And yeah, we’re omnivores and designed to be that way, but how does a person spontaneously develop a craving for brains, and how does one’s (undead) digestive system suddenly deal with eating people raw? I mean, seriously. Zombie outbreaks happen, and you never see people rolling around in agony and dying of bowel flux and dehydration. Sorry. That’s unspeakably gross. But I have trouble suspending disbelief about some things.”

Neither could she care less about Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie, and their six U.N. representative children they’ve hauled up from London for the month.

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However! Should you care, the movie is called World War Z, and is apparently nothing like the book (movies never are) which allegedly takes place in Philadelphia. Having never been to Philly, we have no idea if it looks the same, but frankly throwing up a few street signs, American traffic lights and scattering yellow cabs and SWAT and police vehicles around a Scottish city doesn’t exactly make it look American. On the other hand, those things are like adding spices to a dish; they’re tiny touches that no one will notice but which will make a difference. Unless you’re from Glasgow, and then George Square will still look a lot like …George Square.

It’s all in good fun, though. Except to the cab drivers, who would like to set the whole bunch of them on fire for snarling up the traffic.

Ah, well. In four days, none of this will be our problem anyway. Woot!

11 Replies to “This Land is Your Land, Oh, Wait. Not Really.”

    1. Yep, that’s the correct word. We hadn’t realized that we haven’t seen hydrants around here — or else that they’re just shaped so very differently. Seeing them in a bunch does make them seem disturbingly mobile, doesn’t it?

  1. If you guys run outside and flash those Hollywood accents, perhaps you can get good paying temp jobs as extras – money for new plants for the new garden, a new coffee table – the options are limitless!

    1. True, true. We actually saw a casting call for this – but they wanted people to scream and run, not be zombies. I daresay one doesn’t need an American accent, really, to scream and run. One would need a lot of tolerance for nonsense, though, and … sadly, we’re fresh out.

  2. I enjoyed World War Z in a similar way I enjoyed Life as We Knew It, i.e. I considered counting the food cans in my cupboard. I’m no zombie fan (though Justine Larbalestier makes me think twice about that stance), and T. has a good point about zombies not eating each other. If the film ends up being an entity in its own right, that would be one thing. I’m still haunted by the film Children of Men in a different way than I brood about The Children of Men the book. World War Z thus far sounds like… it won’t be like that.

    But hey, in four days, you’ll be free of Brad Pitt and the Zombies!

  3. Oh brother I say..Zombie movies I wouldn’t waste my time on that tripe. I’m not a big fan of Hollywood movies in the first place. Up here in AK we’re getting more movies made here due to the benefits the state is giving them for doing so. Nan

  4. I’m familiar with film tricks of Toronto-as-New York and Cardiff-as-London, but I admit that Glasgow-as-Philadelphia is a new one on me.

    I have been to Philly. A number of years ago, but I seem to recall it looking nothing at all like Glasgow.

    1. I think if they stay away from the older sandstone, except for an iconic one or two, they might be okay. Most East Coast cities have tons of Anglophile types of architecture and statuary, so it’ll maybe blend… aaand there might be a lot of the film equivalent of Photoshoppery, too.

  5. i lived in philly throughout my 20s. The yellow cabs make Glasgow look sorta like NYC, but it doesn’t look a bit like philadelphia to my mind!

    funnily enough, though, Glasgow is the UK city that reminds me the most of PHiladelphia in terms of character.

    1. Oh, interesting! Well, then, I think we can officially declare Philadelphia as “gritty” and possibly say it has “mean streets” or something equally movie-esque, which means it would then match Glasgow. 🙂

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